I woke up anxious, jittery and with a little black cloud hovering over me.
Some days are just like that. Crappy. Nothing you say, do or think makes it any better. All the LOA practices seem to be a struggle. Thinking happy thoughts is a far cry from the current SOM (state of mind).
Moving up the vibrational scale consciously is akin to climbing Everest in your skinnies. Your favourite newly created big band playlist that had you dancing and skipping for joy is sounding like a cat’s claws on cement.
No matter what, it’s just not working.
That’s when technology decides to kick the bucket, you look at the list of things that need doing and have a moment of panic, the fridge is empty cos you’ve been away 2 weeks, the thermostat decides to go wonky and leak some weird liquidy stuff all over the floor, the rug gets wet, it’s hot and humid and oh.my.goodness. is. this. really. happening just 12 hours after everything was hunky dory?
Welcome to the real world, sweetheart. (hmm wonder why the emphasis on “real”. Gotta look into that one!)
So I did what any of you smart girls (or guys) would do. I “gave up”.
Faced with the alternative of not being able to relax “I can’t let up, I’ve got to stay in do-do-do mode till I get it all done, there’s a month of stuff to catch up on, I have to plan for the next 4 months, the year is almost over, I didn’t do all that I said I would, ra ra ra deee da” ..
Gosh, my heart’s beating faster and my mind’s in a frenzy just by TYPING this out – can you imagine what would happen if I let myself take these thoughts on for longer than that?
Na-ah. Not gonna happen!
Well it did, but for about a quarter of an hour. I took a break from writing, stepped away from the computer and lay down on my yoga mat. Then I meditated for 7 minutes. Or, tried to – hey 7 minutes out of 15 ain’t half bad.
This is the day I’m going to be extra nice to myself and be real proud of being half of what I can be and doing even half of that 😉
A part of me said, “great, you’re feeling better, now get to that bit of work again”. It didn’t feel good to do that though, so I decided to do “mindless” internet stuff, read a few blog posts and whatever I was inspired to do.
Boy, am I GLAD I ignored my not-feel-good cos I found exactly what I needed (not surprised, really).
Words that spoke to me, a song that cldn’t help but make me smile http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5IIXeR5OUI&NR=1, an unexpected (expected but long forgotten) check in the mail for $160, an exchange on a blog post with a coach friend, fun and flattering compliments from cute guys..
Hehe the list is growing and without even trying, just like that, I’m back to relaxed, happy and what have you.
Holy wow, did you see what just happened!? It took less than an hour to go from double blah to a few shades of rosy pink. Not saying I’m on top of my game yet B.U.T I’m getting there, and real close again to feeling like a lark (not that you’d know from my singing abilities.. LOL).
The key to it all? Not trying. Just going with the flow, trusting and letting go. Sometimes, you just gotta do that.
There’s power in acknowledging, allowing and accepting that all days aren’t created equal and neither are all fridges or Nutella batches.
A step up, one step at a time is all that’s needed.
I’ve heard the seed + sapling + tree analogy about 4 times from different sources in the past week, so I’m taking that as a sign that desires have been planted, roots are growing, it’s all unfolding very nicely.
I think I hear a big band line up calling my name http://blip.fm/tia_singh ♬♬ Start spreading the news …. ♬♬ Stars in my eyes on blueberry hill ♬♬♬ as I’m singing n dancing in the rainnnn ♬♬♬
Over to You.