Q&A: How do You Stop Being Attached & Free Yourself?

Today, be the Observer. Let your feelings come and go without getting attached to them. Don’t fight them, just notice them. Allow them. What happens when you simply watch?

I posted this message on the Your Life YOUR Way facebook page the other day and one of you had a question about it.

“It’s really difficult for me… how I can move ahead when my feeling are always getting attached when I observe?”

And I said by way of reply:

Observing means that when you realise you’re upset, you just acknowledge that. Perhaps you might say to yourself “hmmm how interesting, I seem to be really sad / angry / disappointed / insert what you’re feeling here”.

Notice where you feel it in your body. Are your fists clenched? Is your breathing shallow? Is your neck tense? Then breathe a few deep breaths. You’ll find the feeling start to lessen and the charge go away, leaving with you a sense of calm and peace.

Often, you’ll find that when you’re in the middle of a strong emotion, once you realise what’s happening and tune into the feeling, it starts to melt away and you’ll see that all feelings start and end with you.

You’re the one making stories about what happened. You’re the one choosing to feel bad, allowing yourself to be triggered by something.

And so, you are the one who can choose to change your thoughts, feelings, your experience of something. That can only happen when you’re aware that you’re feeling a certain way in the first place.

Which is why I said, observe. Become aware. In doing that, you’ve won half the battle, maybe all of it, against being led by your emotions, instead of leading with your conscious mind.

Now I’d like to ask you, do you have any tips, suggestions, ideas to share with her? What has been your experience with thoughts that you find yourself getting attached to, how do you move past them knowing that what you think about, you bring about?

I’m tapping into your essential, collective wisdom here. Thanks in advance for sharing!

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  1. says

    Definitely an interesting article. I’ll try to think this way today. I’ve often wondered if it’s better for your mental health to be passive, yet aware of your own emotions.

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