Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do… but how much love we put in that action. – Mother Teresa.
(This is a post by Kimberly Riggins).
I used to think my relationship could withstand the test of time.
I believed we were strong, solid, and unbreakable.
Boy, did I have a lot to learn.
Guess what happens when you stop working on your relationship? When you take your partner for granted, use him/her as a punching bag, and push them away instead of pulling them close?
It nearly destroys your relationship.
And the aftermath hurts like hell.
But I wouldn’t reverse what happened because without this experience I never would have learned these valuable lessons. Lessons that changed how I looked at relationships forever. Perhaps you can learn from them too!?
Here’s what I now know about nurturing healthy, happy relationships.
1) Take 100% responsibility for your relationship.
I know some people say you should approach your relationship with a 50/50 attitude but I’ve learned through my own ups and downs that taking full responsibility is key. Commit to your relationship for yourself. Give it your all.
Don’t half-ass love. It doesn’t work.
2) Practice forgiveness.
Here’s the thing… we are all human which means we are all imperfect. We sometimes do stupid shit, say mean things, and act in ways we normally wouldn’t dream of. And so does our spouse or partner.
They are human too. Remember, that in order to have a successful relationship, you must practice forgiveness because everyone messes up from time to time.
3) Express your feelings.
I have certainly held my feelings in, allowed them to fester, bubble over and cause more stress and strife than necessary. Expressing our feelings is healthy and essential to a long fantastic relationship.
Tell your partner how you are feeling.
4) Choose happiness over being right.
Have you ever heard someone say to you, “It is better to be happy than to be right?” Take this to heart.
Truly listen to that statement. Being right may feel good initially but at what expense? So the next time you are in an argument with your partner, ask yourself, “Do I need to be right or do I want to be happy?”
It will shift the entire conversation.
5) Stop being stingy with your endearment.
Don’t just assume your partner knows you love them.
You have to tell them, show them and tell them again. Always remind them how much you appreciate them, love them and need them in your life. Remember, your partner is not a mind reader.
6) Apologize when appropriate.
A heartfelt apology goes a long way. Again, it’s not about being “right,” it’s about being happy. So when you screw up, say you are sorry. And of course, say it like you mean it.
A half-assed apology is worse than not offering one at all.
7) Make them a priority.
As women we wear various hats. We are businesswomen, employees, mothers, wives, best friends, daughters—the list goes on and on. It is imperative that you make time for your partner. Everything else can wait. Your relationship can’t. Put them first.
I know that most of you may read these lessons and say, “I know this.” But the question is—do you actually put them into practice?
Do you make time for your partner, apologize when you are wrong, show your partner how much you appreciate them, tell them how much you love them, and remember that they are human just like you, with faults and flaws?
I certainly hope so because love is something that should not be taken for granted. It should be treasured and cherished and treated with the utmost respect.
Because ultimately, love is what matters most.
Over to you – what are your thoughts on this? I would love to hear your relationship lessons + tips, thanks for sharing!
Kimberly Riggins is a body image & self-love expert. She is the author of the inspirational book, Love Your Naked Ass, the creator of The Ravishing Renegade, a 30-day program where women learn to discover self-love and the chief initiator of the philanthropy mission “The Watch Her Thrive Project.” To learn more about Kimberly or to take her Love Your Naked Ass Dare, visit http://kimberlyriggins.com.
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