Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. – Albert Einstein.
A while back I had a realization that pretty much changed my life.
I was taking an inventory of my past relationships. To see what happened, where things could have gone down differently, see what kind of guys I was choosing, behavior I was doing.
And as I was looking through these relationships, I had a realization that changed everything for me: that the only consistent thing in ALL my failed relationships was ME.
And more than that, not only was I the only consistent factor, my behaviors were also consistent within the relationships.
And this got me thinking of everything that was undesirable in my life.
Procrastination? Yep… I’m the only one doing it.
Not having enough fun? Yep… me again
Someone in my life is still getting on my nerves? I’m the one reacting the same way I always have and doing the same thing I’ve ever done.
In life, we learn a system of operating. We learn this pretty young, and then we repeat the same behaviors over and over again all throughout our lives until it feels like the ONLY way we can possibly be.
But what happens is that we then attract a bunch of situations that are all similar. Friends are ‘ALWAYS taking advantage of us’, we’re ‘ALWAYS attracting a certain kind of guy’, work ‘ALWAYS feels the same’.
And the reason this is, is because we’re doing the same things. When we do the same thing we’ve always done, we’re going to get the same result we’ve always gotten. 100% of the time.
So if you want a different result, you have to try something different.
Unfortunately, we can’t change other people. We can’t make them treat us how we want them to, or react how we want.
The only thing we CAN do is change the way we think about it, or how we respond to it.
And the good news is…the practice of this is actually quite simple.
SIMPLY… DO THE OPPOSITE
If you want a different result than you usually get, do the exact opposite of what you would normally do.
This week is all about trying something different, and seeing what happens.
So if there is something in your life that is undesirable right now, think of the behavior pattern you might be in, and practice “doing the opposite.”
1) Ask yourself: What in my life is undesirable right now?
It could be anything from a relationship with someone else (dating partner/husband, work relationships, etc) to an overall situation (“I’m still not writing that blog post…etc).
2) And then: What am I doing that is similar to what I usually do?
For example… if your undesirable thing is procrastinating writing a blog post, perhaps a similar behavior might be to distract yourself by cleaning the house.
3) And then: What would be the exact opposite of that?
In the example above, the opposite might be to set a timer to write your blog post and when you’re done you get a reward.
4) Action: Do the opposite. In the moments. Practice this all week long.
It’s actually much more simple than we think to change our behaviors. First, you just need to be aware that you’re doing them, and then make a conscious effort for them to be different.
Try this out and see what happens! I’d love to hear your comments below. Please share this post if you liked it, thanks.
Sally Hope is a motorcycle riding, skeet shooting, hot-pink lipstick loving renegade life coach and the leader of the Wildheart Revolution. Her biggest goal in life is to help you Carpe The Hell Outta Your Diem. For tips on how, join her at www.sallyhope.com or on Facebook, where she hangs out most of the time.
Main pic credit: Flickr.com, Pink Sherbet Photography.